17 December 2006

Just call me Super Uncle

Here's the background -

Yesterday we were going to take the FB to see the reindeer at the local supermarket, but alas when we got there the event had been cancelled as someone had been murdered in the carpark.

I was explaining to the FB this morning why they had to cancel the event - someone got badly hurt in the carpark at the supermarket (I'm too soft to tell him that someone got killed there) and the police are trying to find out who hurt them. They need to stop people walking around there in case they pick up something the police need to help them.
I then explained to him that the police will catch them and then his uncle will tell them off. His uncle used to be a barrister (yes he has a wig, and a little box to keep it in, and a little grooming kit to look after it) with the Crown Prosecution Service (like the US DA, I don't know what the Aussie version is). The FB looked at me and said "and den UncleG will fight dem" just like his very own superhero. MrV then phoned his sister to let her know that her fiance is an undercover crime fighting superhero and she replied by text:
His already large head has now swollen another two sizes. It's a tough job being Top Uncle but someone has to do it.

And I finished it. I finished the cross stitch. MrV took the FB into town to do some present shopping (for me) and I spent the 5 hours I had free sewing and watching grownup television including a fascinating documentary about kodiak grizzlies narrated by Brad Pitt. I'll photograph the finished picture and post it tomorrow. Bring shades.


Stomper Girl said...

That was a cute ending to a very different story. Your local supermarket had a murder in it? Gosh. Ours just has the occasional bingle and a few fights over parking spots.

I told my boy about how my cousin had bravely fought off a bad robber (didn't mention the attempted rape to him of course), and he endowed her with super powers just like your FB did. I love the way kids' brains work.

Congrats on the cross-stitch.

nutmeg said...

Yes, explaining what dead and death mean is a little confronting. Daughter #1 only seemed to start to understand the word when it got a little close to home - our cat died a few months ago.

I will live vicariously through your FINISHED cross-stitch :-)

caramaena said...

Everyone needs a superhero in the family ;)

Yay for finishing the cross-stitch!

velcro said...

there has been 3 murders and 2 violent beatings in the last year in the area. The violence has just escalated which is one of the reasons why we want to get out of here.

I think I would much rather have the bingle (?) and the fights over parking spots anyday!

Am so so glad your cousin fought off the bad guy

aunty evil said...

Geeze Velcro, 3 murders and 2 violent beatings in your shopping centre?

I can't imagine what the post Christmas sales will bring!

Seriously though, it's time for you to come to Australia. No more mucking around, pack your things.

velcro said...

fortunately Aunty the shops around here are so crap that there is never a post christmas sales rush. there are a few fab shops though like the art shop and the craft shop up near the FB's nursery.

velcro said...

As for moving to Australia - a song I heard two unofficial Aussie tourist office reps sing on tv (you have probably all heard it but it made me laugh)

Redback, Funnel-Web, Blue-ringed octopus

Taipan, Tigersnake and a Box jellyfish
Stonefish and the poison thing that lives in a shell
That spikes you when you pick it up

Come to Australia
You might accidentally get killed

Your life's constantly under threat
Have you been bitten yet?
You've only got three minutes left
Before a massive coronary breakdown

Redback, Funnel-Web, Blue-ringed octopus
Tiapan, Tigersnake and a Box jellyfish
Big shark just waiting for you to go swimming
At Bondi Beach

Come to Australia
You might accidentally get killed
Your blood is bound to be spilled
With fear your pants will be filled
Because you might accidentally get killed

angelfeet said...

I am a Londoner through-and-through but this is getting too close for comfortable living.

But, hey, some good news, Nottingham, not London, is the crime capital of England, according to a report this year.